Q: We have a neutered 2 1/2 year German Shepherd named Elmo. He's a great dog but there are a few things about him that concern me. At night, right before bed, if we come out to say goodnight, he immediately grabs the first toy or bone he has nearby and protects it. If you come near his face, he groans or growls and gets up and moves to another location (only if you try to kiss or hug him). We've trained him with the word "nice", and if I forcibly say it, he will be nice and becomes submissive.

He only acts like this at night, do you know why he does this? During the day, he likes to play by you grabbing something away from him, that's his favorite game. He can be very aggressive at times, but can be quickly put in his place (usually with just the word "NICE"). He is very active, protective, and loves to bark at everything. He scares visitors but allows them in after a through sniffing. He usually leaves them be but sometimes makes me nervous by going to them and barking again for no apparent reason. He seems to be afraid of certain people, and acts very "squirrely". I don't trust him 100% and am afraid he may try to bite someone. He has jumped up and growled in the past but has calmed down some after being neutered. Also, before he was neutered, he would bark and growl if a teenage friend was over during a feeding in the kitchen. He no longer does that.

My husband says he's protecting his things from the kids because he sees them as an equal. We have always fed him after we eat our dinner first, and I have told the kids to immediately scold him for growling at them and not to allow it (again, if they tell him "nice," he becomes submissive). Do you see this as a potential problem, and how else can we nip this behavior? Thanks!

A: This sounds like a German Shepherd with possibly quite a good temperament, but a woeful lack of the very serious training this breed requires. If you find the right obedience class, go faithfully every week with the dog and stick with it for several months. These problems may fall right into place, then. I would suggest you, the mom, be the trainer.

Then everyone in the family has to follow your instructions in handling the dog, because you will be the one who has gained the training skills through class--and most of all through that diligent practice every day that turns handler and dog into a real team. Your husband developing this partnership with the dog might not be as effective in the family dynamics as if you are the one who does it.

Correcting a dog for undesirable behavior is just not enough. In fact, it can create a very negative situation that pushes a dog closer and closer to aggression from his defense drives. He needs a job to do and he's trying to figure out what it is. By getting very dedicated about training him, you will define that job for him and leadership will no longer be an issue. Just doing dominance exercises without doing real training is a big bluff on your part that a smart dog like the German Shepherd will eventually see through--and he will call your bluff.

Before you take him to any class, go visit it first a few times without taking a dog. You can probably find an affordable class in your area through a local obedience training club. They are listed by state on the AKC website at http://www.akc.org. When you observe a class, here's what you want to see. The instructor should be treating the people with respect--firmness, sure, but not humiliating or insulting them.

The instructor should be coaching the students to treat their dogs humanely, but keep them under control at all times. You want to see dogs minding their own business, paying attention to instructions from their owners and leaving the other dogs alone. This is what you want your dog to learn, and a class where he has to watch out for other dogs getting in his face would work against that message.

You are going to need to be the one to train your dog. It's not a very good idea for the instructor to take your leash and give your dog a harsh correction. If you see an instructor doing that in class, it may not be the right place for you to train--unless you have confidence the instructor will respect your wishes and not do this to your dog. German Shepherds bond strongly to their owners and your dog will react better to even an inept, learner-style correction from you than he would to harshness from the trainer. You don't want to leave the class with more aggression problems than you had before.

In class, you want to see the dogs being taught to do things on command. Not just "Don't do this, don't do that." We humans tend to ignore dogs unless they bug us and then we just want to know how to make them stop bugging us! You need to teach a dog what you DO want him to do, in order to train effectively.

Then if he is, for example, subjecting a visitor to a sniffing that would be more appropriate in a prison (!), you can instruct him to do something else instead. A correction becomes a very quick thing, over in an instant, which avoids creating defensiveness in a dog. After a correction, you need to--in a split second--have the dog doing something positive, for which you can give him sincere praise.

German Shepherds have very strong defense drives, and he is three times as strong as his weight, compared to a human. That is most likely stronger than you and possibly even stronger than your husband. You don't ever want to fight with your dog. You want to be able to direct this dog in a positive manner as his respected and beloved leader--and that takes skill on your part, skill you can acquire by diligent work in class and daily practice of the class homework, for several months.

I think your dog is at a crossroads. He is probably a temperamentally sound dog but he needs more structure. Without it, you will likely see deterioration of his behavior. If you got him from a responsible breeder, you need to be in touch with the breeder now about the behavior you are seeing.

It's possible your breeder will have suggestions about a class in your area. However, do go check out the class without your dog first. Some instructors are in the habit of getting tough with big dogs like male German Shepherds. But any method used to train your dog will have to be possible for you to do, forever, in order to keep the dog under control. Best to learn a method in the first place that works in your family. There are plenty of instructors out there who can help you.