Image courtesy Emily Day AAB-UW, KPA CTP, SDC, SBA-IAABC
Image courtesy Emily Day AAB-UW, KPA CTP, SDC, SBA-IAABC
Why Pets Seek Attention
Dogs and cats are social animals. They communicate with you using body language, vocal sounds, and certain behaviors. These behaviors can mean “I need something” or simply that your pet wants your company. Some actions may seem annoying or problematic, but are not always good or bad. Understanding the reasons behind these behaviors helps you better understand your pet’s emotional and physical needs.
Common Attention-Seeking Behaviors and What They Mean
- Stealing, Knocking Things Over, Mouthing Hands or Objects
These behaviors may happen when your pet feels ignored or bored. Grabbing items or causing a mess may be a way to get a quick reaction. Even scolding can be rewarding if it leads to attention.
- Excessive Vocalizations (Meowing, Barking, Whining, Howling)
Your pet may be trying to say, “I am hungry,” “Let me out,” or “Play with me.” If vocalizing has worked before, they will likely continue using it to get your attention.
- Pawing, Licking, Mouthing, or Biting
These physical behaviors are often attempts to connect or play. Some pets do this when excited or unsure how to interact. They may not yet have learned how to ask politely for attention.
- Following You, Rubbing Against You, Sitting on Your Lap, or Staring
These behaviors can show affection or be requests for something your pets want, such as food, play, or comfort. Pets often repeat what has worked for them in the past.
How to Respond to Attention-Seeking Behaviors
When your pet shows attention-seeking behavior, first check that their needs are being met:
- Do they have food and clean water?
- Have they had enough physical activity today?
- Have they had play or enrichment time?
- Have they had time to go outside?
- Does their litter box need to be cleaned?
If their needs are met and the behavior continues, use positive reinforcement to redirect them to a better choice. Avoid scolding or pushing them away; even saying “no” can reinforce the behavior if your pet sees it as attention.
It can be hard to ignore these behaviors, especially if they have worked before. That is why they often continue. If your pet keeps repeating something you do not like, it likely means the behavior has been unintentionally rewarded. Teaching a more appropriate behavior and meeting your pet’s needs early can help stop the cycle.
Common Attention-Seeking Behaviors and What to Teach Instead
| Attention-Seeking Behaviors |
Alternative Behaviors to Teach |
| Stealing, knocking objects over, mouthing hands or objects |
Reward your pet for bringing the object to you; ask for a toy to redirect their energy. |
| Excessive vocalization (meowing, barking, whining, howling) |
Ask for a known behavior, such as sitting, touching, or lying down; add a pause before giving the reward, and slowly make the pauses longer over time. |
| Pawing, Licking, Mouthing, or Biting |
Teach a hand target; teach a chin rest; teach a nose bump; teach “go get a toy”. |
| Following you, rubbing on you, sitting in your lap, staring at you |
Ask for a touch cue such as a hand target, hip target, or paw. |
emily22.jpg - Caption. [Optional]
Image courtesy Emily Day AAB-UW, KPA CTP, SDC, SBA-IAABC
Building a Better Routine
Pets feel more secure and behave better when they have a routine. Predictable schedules help reduce anxiety and the need to demand attention.
Try adding:
• Regular mealtimes
• Daily walks or play sessions
• Scheduled quiet times or naps
• Puzzle toys or games to keep their minds active
When your pet knows their needs will be met, they are less likely to act out in disruptive ways.
Need More Help? If your pet's behavior is difficult to manage or does not improve, reach out to a certified trainer. Also, speak with your veterinarian to rule out any medical issues that may be contributing to the behavior.